Gendo and Shinji (Relationship)

Gendo and Shinji have one of the most complicated, and central relationships in all of Evangelion. The relationship is ostensibly one of mutual distance, but underlying feelings -- positive and negative -- remain.

Summary

Birth and Naming

Shinji is Gendo's only child with Yui. While Shinji is inside Eva 01, he hears a memory of Yui and Gendo discussing what their child will be named. Gendo chose the name "Shinji" for a boy, and "Rei" for a girl.

Abandonment

Abandonment

Gendo abandoned Shinji some time after Yui disapeared into Eva-01, sending him to live with his "sensei". A recurring visual associated with this an image of a young Shinji, crying next to a train line. During a dreamscape inside the angel Leliel, this image is expanded on with one of Gendo walking away from the platform, his back to Shinji, suggesting that this was the place where Gendo personally abandoned Shinji.

Additionally, in the Leliel dreamscape, Shinji is accused of running away from the relationship himself. It is suggested that the young Shinji's own reaction to Gendo's trial was a factor in their poor relationship.

Subsequent to this abandonment, Gendo and Shinji did appear to make yearly visits to Yui's grave on the anniversary of her "death". On the last of these -- three years before the series begins -- Shinji ran away from the graveside and did not meet Gendo again.

Reunion in Tokyo-3

Torn-up letter from Gendo.

Hanger Encounter
Gendo: It's been a while. Shinji: Father... Gendo: Sortie. Shinji: Father, why did you send for me? Gendo: You know exactly why. Shinji: So, you're asking me to take this thing and fight that thing? Gendo: That's right. Shinji: No way! Why are you doing this now?! I thought you didn't need me! Gendo: I called you because I have a need for you. Shinji: Why me? Gendo: Because no one else can. Shinji: No, I can't... I've never even seen anything like this before! I can't do this! Gendo: You will be instructed. Shinji: But there's no way I can do this! I can't pilot it! Gendo: If you're going to pilot it, do it now and quickly. If not, leave!

Shortly after the Eva 00 Accident, with Rei incapacitated, Gendo summon's Shinji to Tokyo-3 to act as a backup pilot.

On his arrival at Nerv HQ, when Misato asks Shinji for his ID card, Shinji hands her the letter Gendo sent. All of the printed words on the letter have been erased with black highlighter, replaced only with a handwritten message from Gendo which reads "COME -- Gendo Ikari". Moreover, Shinji has scribbled over Gendo's words in red pen and torn up the paper out of frustration at his father, later taping the pieces back together(Perhaps after getting a load of Misato's picture!).

Later, while he is inside Eva 01, it is revealed that Shinji's original intention in coming to Tokyo-3 was to tell Gendo that he hated him.

Following Sachiel's attack, Shinji is brought to Eva-01's hanger to meet his father, who is standing above in the control room. Gendo orders Eva 01 to sortie. When it becomes clear that Shinji is the intended pilot, he still asks Gendo why he has been summoned, after his previous abandonment, and with no prior notice. Gendo explains that he has need of Shinji now, and that Shinji will be shown how to pilot, but when Shinji persists in declaring that he is unable, Gendo loudly issues an ultimatum: Pilot the Eva now -- or leave. Shinji is stunned by this, and afterwards cannot muster the courage to pilot.

Gendo ascertains the situation, then orders Rei to pilot Eva 01, as her "spare" Shinji is "unusable". Shinji, recalling his abandonment, concludes that he was not needed all along.

Shinji eventually does agree to pilot, after seeing Rei's sufferring, and after being saved from falling hanger lights by Eva 01 -- which drew a confident smirk from Gendo. However, Shinji later recalls this encounter, and Gendo's cold ultimatum to "leave", on several occasions.

"Natural to be Apart"

Shinji and Gendo live separately in Tokyo-3 and rarely interact with one another. Upon encountering Gendo at an elevator in the hospital, Shinji refuses to enter. Shinji is assigned to live on his own; as Fuyutsuki explains to Ritsuko, for Gendo and his son, it is more natural to be apart. When Shinji attempts to leave Tokyo-3, Gendo makes no effort to stop or dissuade him.

Shinji learns of Gendo's rescue of Rei, and to his amazement observes the two speaking cordially together.

Phone Call

Phone Call
Telephone Operator: Yes, please hold for just a moment. Gendo: What? Shinji: Um, Father... Gendo: What is it? Spit it out! Shinji: Well... Actually today... We were told to tell our parents... ...that they're having a career discussion interview at school. Gendo: I've delegated all such things to Captain Katsuragi. Don't call me over such nonsense. Don't forward any more of these calls to...(Phone line cuts out)

Gendo's Praise

Shinji still longs for words of praise from Gendo, despite the times his father has abandoned him. It is a very vicious cycle; Shinji will yearn for praise and be continually disappointed until it is given, which lulls him into a false sense of security only for Gendo to swoop down and ruin it.

Yui's Graveside

Yui's Graveside
Gendo: It's been three years since the last time we came here together. Shinji: I ran away then, and haven't been back since. It just hasn't sunk in that Mother is resting here. I don't even remember her face. Gendo: Man survives by forgetting his memories, but there are some things a man should never forget. Yui taught me about the irreplaceable things. I come here to confirm that. Shinji: You have no pictures of her? Gendo: There are none left. This grave is just a decoration too. There's no corpse. Shinji: So, the teacher was right. You threw them all away. Gendo: I keep everything in my heart. That is enough for now. Gendo: It's time. I'm leaving now. Shinji: (Catching glipse of Rei) Father! Shinji: Um, I'm glad I got to talk to you today. Gendo: I see.